


Start Your Free Trial

by spun809



Series: Supernatural 30 day Challenge [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Canon Divergent, Canon Typical Violence, Coda s8e14, Dean is a lack luster boyfriend, F/M, Sam doesn't do trials, Season 8
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-05
Updated: 2017-04-05
Packaged: 2018-10-15 05:24:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10550800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spun809/pseuds/spun809
Summary: Set in season 8 episode 14, at the onset of the trials. The reader is tired of watching her boyfriend Dean and his brother Sam struggle with the year they spent apart. She wants to help make a difficult choice easier.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is for Day 3 of the SPN 30 Day challenge, which asks what is your favorite season. Mine has to be season 8 :)

You could at least understand, in theory, where Sam was coming from. It was hard to believe that Dean, would suddenly be trusting monsters, after his little stay in Purgatory. Although, another part of you, kind of thought Sam’s idea of quitting the life for some girl and a dog was even less likely. It was like the two of them had both become different people in this last year. Not just because your boyfriend had been sucked into a different dimension and spent it battling for his life, or that his little brother had just vanished overnight.

Suddenly, the two brothers who had done nothing, but fought to keep the other around, they could hardly look at each other, much less you. Even Cas was acting stranger than before. You felt completely alone. Fighting pointlessly to try and keep your makeshift family together.

In the weeks since they had been back, every small decision was causing friction between the three of you. In one moment things would appear calm, maybe one of the boys was accepting that things were different now, and then it was back to everything being in shambles. Leaving you wondering how people in the real world were able to function, without an epic disaster every few days, like you had grown accustomed to. When Mr. Advanced Placement called, you were ready to have something to tally in the win column. 

Once Kevin had told you about the trials, you knew it would be a total Winchester-off for which brother would be able to sacrifice themselves first, and the bug in your brain about it had started. You didn’t understand why both of the men, who you had been with night and day for years, were suddenly ready to check out of not only hunting, but life in general. All you could do is wait for the prophet to go into details of what these tasks were to close the gates, and then deal with the inevitable fallout. 

Sam had a certain gleam in his eye, as he asked about, “God wants us to take the SAT’s?” 

“Sort of, it’s totally gross, you have to kill a hound-of-Hell and bathe in its blood.” Kevin was looking worse than usual, and there was some dried blood caked around his nostrils.

“Easy enough,” Dean started in with a tangent on dog puns and it was obvious that he was dying to be the one to complete the trials.

You said nothing though, as you gave Kevin a hug and faux punched Dean when he brought back a pharmacy to the hard-up profit, only thinking about the fact that if one of you was dispensable it wasn’t a Winchester, it was you. 

When you pulled up to the multi-million dollar ranch, you only knew that the goal was to find a Hellhound and gank it. You had yourself a hearty chuckle as you watched as Dean settled into his new ranch hand role, shoveling really seemed to suit him, and you felt calm inside as you brushed out a palominos mane and contemplated what completing a trial would feel like. 

When Carl wound up dead you could see the frustration taking over Dean, it wasn’t just at the lack of having someone to save, he was clearly ready to take on these trials and was less than careful about how it was going to happen. As you called both boys to meet after collecting themselves, you could tell that Sam had learned something. 

“That’s not a plan Dean that suicide,” Sam started another round of bickering between the two of them.

The older of the two felt sure that he needed to rush, to kill first and question later. While Sammy was sure that Dean was just willing to sacrifice his life in an attempt at being the one to do the trials. It was as if with their pent up frustrations towards each other that you almost didn’t exist at all. You decided to break things up, in an attempt at restoring your own sanity. These days all the fighting made you want to run screaming into the void. 

“All right, we are going to stay, and see if any other deals were made.” Making sure you didn’t leave any room in your tone for an argument. 

As night fell and Ellie gave you all your tasks for the evening, you admired the way the moonlight and the flames from the grill illuminated Dean’s features. His eyes were clouded as he stared at the fire even though a smile hung on his face, it was obvious that deep down, he was busy wishing that he was in the midst of sacrificing himself in the throws of the trials.

Taking a tray inside you carefully kissed the edge of his mouth.

“I love you, Dean Winchester.”

“You too babe.”

You tried not to let your heart break, he didn’t even glance back at you. You ignored it and tried to see if you could get any more information out of the family during the course of dinner, maybe if they were all drunk, somebody would spill something. As you helped Sam pour out even larger portions of wine for the obviously deal-hungry family, you couldn’t even find it in yourself to be surprised at the mentions of Crowley. You went off to find Dean and give him the low-down on what you and Sam had learned. 

“I like it the whole Clark Kent look,” Ellie was clearly unabashed in her attempts to pick up Dean. 

Luckily, you weren’t the jealous type. You watched as another girl threw herself into the arms of your man, and as he watched her walk away, you noticed that he barely even registered your presence. It didn’t hurt as much as it should have, there was something growing in the spaces between you and Dean. After he came back from purgatory it seemed like he was adrift in an effort to escape the world he no longer felt he fit into. Your relationship seemed to be nothing more than a painful reminder of that, to him. 

“Dean, can we talk?” You were talking to his profile, noticing how handsome he looked in the boxy framed glasses, then you heard a gunshot. You guessed the conversation would have to wait.

The whole family was congregated inside. The tensions were high between not just the Cassidy’s but you could see it on your boy’s faces as well. Dean was fidgety, looking like he was ready to punch someone or something in the face. There was some quick, this is crazy and I didn’t sell my souls from the various family members before Dean reserve snapped. 

“Well somebody did,” Dean said.

“Alright, seal them in.” You were done playing this game, someone here sold their soul. For all you knew, all of them had, and so you watched as Sam cuffed them all to various items of furniture.

Dean was busy making snide comments, but when he actually started to talk about how he didn’t see a way out of this life, that he would never be able to give you a family, you slapped him in the face. He stared at you, his eyes bulging in shock, and then he stormed out. You regretted it instantly, but you were so tired, when those green eyes looked at you, he looked through you. Seeing a life where you could move on to something better, without him. He was too important, too special to just give up his life like this. 

It was just a freak coincidence, as the sound of yipping and deep growls came from outside, that one of the Cassidy’s would make a run for it. You saw Sam rush out after her, and he was so absorbed in getting her inside safely you had been acting on nothing but instinct, as you lunged toward the shimmering shape in your glasses, and when you felt the warm, stinking, rush of its blood pour over you, you let your whole body go lax. 

It was done, you were going to be the one who completed the trials. It was going to be over, the gates of Hell would be closed and both of the Winchesters were going to live in the world together. 

“The spells not going to work for you.” You watched as Dean held the scrap of words written out in Enochian, and tried to explain the obvious as calmly as possible. 

“Then we are just going to have to find another hell hound, so I can kill it.” Dean glared down at the empty words that were never going to work for him. He kept avoiding looking at you. Sam hung out quietly in the background refusing to say or do anything that might direct his brothers brewing anger in his direction. 

“Dean, I can do this. Please just trust me.” 

And at that he handed you the piece of paper, “I will always trust you.” His eyes were dewy as he watched you mumble the incantation. 

A fire shot through your palm, you could feel it igniting in every blood cell, and coursed like lava through your veins. In it, there was a type of certainty that you were destined for this, a sense of calm through the agony. You made sure that your face remained passive, not wanting to give Dean more cause for alarm. A sense of direction, a goal, and a purpose. All things you lacked ever since you joined forces with the Winchester’s, now with a track to walk down, knowing soon you would be stopping the onslaught of evil from gaining any more traction. You felt something new, you felt pure.


End file.
